AF arrived as I had anticipated. Bit of a slow start and I seem to be bleeding at random times. It has also been quite painful and I did resort to the ibuprofen/panadol combo at one point. Thankfully not bad enough to crack open the panadeine forte. Thank goodness I'm not dealing with this at work! The nastiness of this cycle has me wondering just how I am going to manage myself hormonally when we are all done with babies... :-/
I seem to change my game plan on a daily basis. However, I have been thinking about our timing. As it stands I'll be next due to ovulate on a weekend or just after it. This is a good thing. It means we are most likely to be able to time sex well. If I take B6 and it drags out my LP by another two days then the next time around will be during the week. Early week is not good because DH is out on Monday nights. That and we start getting closer to a collision with my work. Things will not be good if I have to come home from a 12 or 13 hour work day to try and eat, shower and get laid! So, I'm thinking I'll ditch the B6 afterall.
My mind however, has wandered over to low dose aspirin. There were a lot of factors which could have contributed to success that time e.g. post lap, third clomid cycle, being relaxed etc. The other thing I thought of was that I was back on my sports supps. One or more of which I think had White Willow Bark i.e. the natural aspirin. Of course, I may be wrong about that entirely but even if I am, so what? Although there is a lot of conflicting information the fact that anti-coag meds are used for IVF and IUI patients says something to me about their importance. I figure it doesn't hurt to give it a go and then stop it as soon as I get a positive (assuming that happens before we hit Clomid time again). Who knows...perhaps it will make all the difference.
I was thinking a lot this morning about my situation. I will never really understand how well timed sex with a good semen sample and apparently normal although less than ideal menstrual cycle doesn't result in pregnancy. I struggle to see us being able to do this alone but at the same time I don't really know why Clomid would make that much difference either. Another part of me pipes in about how it is only another five cycles until then if I really want to go down that path straight away. Another part gives me a lecture about how I should appreciate this TTC time because it will probably be the last.
I really need to be more positive. LOL. No pun intended there. I mean that I need to try and believe that this will happen. I need to visualise the positive test and my blossoming belly. I need to own my situation. I want this to happen and I don't want to get all torn up like last time and end up making it all go away. At the end of the day I am in control of how I choose handle my life and the events within it. This is no different. :-) I've only purchased six months on my FF VIP account. I think that is a good start! Now remind me of this when I'm in the TWW and getting all sad!
I think I am also ready to try and engage other people who may be in the same boat. Some blogger types trying for a second or a third or whatever. As much as I may be sucked in to this, it is different from the first time. I want to share things with somebody who is where I am at! Hmmm...may be time to hit the FF forums!
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