I pulled an 11 day LP. I am not entirely sure what to feel about it. It wasn't previously good enough but then again, previously I wasn't getting copious amounts of EWCM and my cervix never seemed to sit in a good position for sperm catching. I guess what I feel is neutral. Not entirely pessimistic but not exactly optimistic either. I'm prepared for nothing. LOL!
DH will be on holidays for the baby making time which will be good. I'm feeling somewhat nervous about getting the timing right. This last cycle was the first since weaning entirely. Things could change. I may ovulate earlier. Or later. I am really not used to not knowing what direction my body will head.
I opted to get pre-preg bloods done just to make sure everything does look good from the outside. I'll probably get that sorted next week when I've got some me time.
I'm still all over the shop when it comes to doing this. One day I am in to it and feeling somewhat enthusiastic, thinking it will be a good idea. The next I am feeling guilty and that I'll be depriving DS of our total attention and resources. With that I swing between my typically impatient state of mind to one of procrastination.
I've been hibernating from the pregnant world. If I don't see it then I am not aware that it is something that we are trying to do and if it isn't working then I won't hurt from it. I worry a bit about how I am going to go as my various mothers groups start to fall pregnant again. I am already setting myself up for the long haul before we have really even begun.
Anyhow, watch and wait from here. AF has been more clear fluid than blood - not sure what to make of that. Last cycle I spotted up to CD12. My body is clunky. Ironic that I'm running less well now that I'm not BFing!
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